This week has notably been pretty bad. Starting last Monday at 5 a.m. it began with a nasty stomach flu. After a trip to the E.R. Tuesday afternoon, fluids and anti-nausea medicine I started to feel a bit more human. By Wednesday night I was keeping everything down and was ready to get back to work on Thursday.
Like I have said in previous posts, life happens. At midnight we got the call that there was a kidney ready for my husband. He has kidney failure and has been on the list a year. This was incredibly exciting and I flew out of bed, forgetting my zombie like life of the last few days and jumped in the car ready to get him to the hospital that was an hour away. Being so early in the wee hours of the morning traffic was great and we got to the hospital in what I am sure was record time. Fast forward to a few hours later, after being told surgery was going to be at 4 a.m. the nephrologist with the transplant came and told us something was different on his EKG than the last one they did. Confused and worried what this meant the surgeon then came and said they would have to let the kidney go to someone else. In light of the EKG they decided he should have a heart catheter which happened later in the day. The good news is there was absolutely no blockage or any problems with his heart. Sadly the kidney was let go for no reason, but of course it is better to be safe then sorry. It was happy news that his heart was healthy, but sad that we went through so much in that day with no new kidney. My husband though, he doesn’t let any of this bother him. He is a happy man who doesn’t sweat the small stuff or the big stuff. I want to be like him.
So against all my very own good advice I committed healthy lifestyle suicide that day and the days that followed. This was my lunch on Thursday late afternoon when my husband was in the operating room having the heart catheterization.
All of my good habits went right out the window when the worry took hold. I don’t think I had one glass of water that day. Friday I headed back to work for the first time that whole week. The amount of stress and worry that I was harboring just over my job and missing so much work led me to more unhealthy choices. Fast food lunch, grocery store fried chicken for dinner, and so on. All of my hard work replaced with sheer exhaustion and frustration. My attitude quite frankly has completely sucked! So what do I do now? For starters I can quit using my problems as an excuse for me not to put in the effort to take better care of myself.
So time to reset! No more pity party for myself. No more using food to help me through my tough days. I am worth the effort, the planning and the time it takes to make healthy choices.
So often life literally trips us up. We stumble and maybe even fall…but the important thing is that you get yourself right back up. Don’t stay down, don’t wallow there in that dark place. Love yourself enough to do whatever it takes to get yourself where you want to be. You are worth it. I did trip, but I will get right back up!
What challenges have you faced this week? What are you doing to pick yourself up when you fall? Please let me know in the comments below. I would love to hear from you!